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4:00 AM

It's 4AM and I can't sleep.  I slept for a little while, but got up for one of my many bathroom trips of the night, and couldn't get back to sleep.
The baby is due in just over 10 weeks.  I feel huge and assume I am because I've been asked on more than one occasion if I'm having twins.  I met a woman recently that wasn't much bigger than me.  She asked when I was due and I told her I wasn't due until May and asked her - how about you?  She replied with '2 weeks'! She was due in 2 weeks and wasn't far off from my size.  I was so embarrassed (even after she assured me she was 'carrying small').  I've gained 25lbs so far (which isn't that bad considering I was on bed rest for a month after having surgery during the 1st trimester). I took a good look in the mirror today and I'm mainly belly.  Sure, I sometimes feel like I'm beginning to resemble Jabba The Hut, but the extra weight isn't really that hard to deal with.  That being said, I hope I don't get too much bigger or I worry I may not be able to stand upright!
I'm excited to finally be into the 3rd trimester.  I really can't wait to meet our little boy.  I'm a bit scared about the birth, but more excited than anything else.  Sometimes it still feels so surreal.  I can't believe I'm going to be a mother.  It's such an amazing feeling and I feel so blessed to be starting a family with a man I truly adore.  I wish I could put into words how wonderful it feels.  I only wish I was going to be around my family and friends when the time comes so I can share it with them as well, but life isn't always perfect and I have to be grateful for all I have.  Happiness takes compromise and I'm learning that you can't have everything. Like I said before - I feel blessed to have the life I have here with Wayne and I'm looking so forward to this new phase of our life to start.

Comments

Christie said…
Hey! Youre body is getting use to being up at 4am for a reason :) My baby is almost a year (this Wednesday) and he had me up at 4 this morning! 25 pounds is nothing! Im sure you look adorable. I am so excited for you. Motherhood is such a blessing! What is your due date?

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