On turning 35

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

One week from today, I turn 35. I hate these milestone birthdays (although I was quite happy thinking 35 wasn't a milestone, but people keep referring to it as one so...). Next week, I'll be officially be closer to 40 than 30.
In my mind, I don't feel 35. I still feel 20-something. I must admit though that lately, I look in the mirror and I look 35. I'm over weight (just gained those dreaded 12 lbs back I struggled to lose) so I'm looking puffy, my skin looks somehow duller and I should also confess I recently started using anti-aging products and I've been pulling out random gray hairs for over a year now.
My body has started changing too. I never had weight issues before in my life, but now I have to work really hard to lose the smallest amount of weight. I've spent the last several years dieting, working out and never actually reaching my goal weight.
Teenagers refer to me as mam and I suddenly feel too old to be shopping in trendy stores, but too young to be shopping in stores geared towards woman my age.
I can't believe I'm old enough to say that I've been friends with my best friend for over 20 years and we weren't children when our friendship started or that I'm old enough to be sexually active for more than half my life! Although, I must admit that both have some of the better aspects of being older (I can't imagine life without either one).
The one thing that's the most difficult about turning 35 is that I still haven't had a child. How is it that I'm all of a sudden high risk and child bearing years are passing me by? I hear my clock ticking louder every day... I hate milestone birthdays.



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