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Showing posts from April, 2007

Some more random thoughts...

I just talked to an old friend for the first time in ages.  It was really nice to catch up and have a fun, light-hearted conversation.  I don't get to do that with people other than my husband much these days.  When Wayne came home, I said - I talked to Roy today - he says I'm funny.  As if this was news worthy.  I guess I sometimes wonder if I still have a personality.  Apparently, Roy thinks I do :-)
My friend Aniela is coming to England this weekend.  We're meeting her, her husband and her daughter in London on Sunday.  I'm looking really froward to it.  I don't get to hang out with friends (especially on my turf) and it will be really nice to feel normal for a change.  We haven't seen them since our trip back to the States and it's going to to be really good to see them.
We're thinking about going on the London Eye while in London (the biggest ferris wheel in the world).  I'll have to see if I can get the nerve - I'm terrified of heights and c…

A friend's words of wisdom

I recieved an email from a friend today offering her support after yesterday's dreary entry.  She told me she knows how I feel having spent a lot of time in Italy (her husband is Italian and now lives in the States with the intention of becoming a citizen).  She told me not to let it get to me too much.  She said,'You have lived here and you know what this country is about.  Yes, we have a
shitty leader, but he does not define us and you were here during 9/11 to see
what being an American truly means.'
That statement says it all.  When 9/11 happened America changed and what it means to be American changed as well.  People here don't understand our Patriotism.  They think it's strange that we pledge allegiance to the flag and stand for our national anthem.  Yes, we've always done that, but since 9/11 I think we all stand a bit taller.
Being from NJ, living so close to NY, 9/11 hit me hard (as I'm sure it did all of the US).  I went to school with someone that di…

Here we go again...

When I heard about the shootings yesterday, my first thought was how horrible it was for the victims and their loved ones.  As it unfolded and the numbers grew, I must admit I started having more and more feelings of dread over the media coverage and the debate that would follow.  I knew it would turn into a frenzy of American bashing.  I knew it would turn into an excuse to pick on the American way of life and I couldn't help but think - here we go again.
This morning, while eating my breakfast, I chose to stay away from American news channels - afraid to hear the things I knew would fuel the opinions of the British public.  I wanted to stay away from hearing the Americans that choose to take this opportunity to fight for the right to bare arms.  I chose BBC News 24 and sat there content with watching stories unrelated to the tragic massacre that took place yesterday.  Wayne came down for breakfast, picked up the remote and changed it over to the talk radio station he was listenin…

Very Random thoughts

I just watched the movie 'The Holiday' It's been a while since I've enjoyed a romantic comedy.  It was really cute.  It was about an English & an American woman who swap houses for a couple of weeks to get away and they both find love in the country they're visiting.  Pretty good concept; although I thought they could have done a bit more with how it is when you visit a foreign country for the first time. 

The acting for the most part wasn't great but for me, the beauty Jude Law made it almost unnoticeable.  That man is the epitome of movie star good looks. Wayne came home in the middle of the movie and asked - How's Jude look?  My reply 'He's Fantastic and yes, he's still number one on my list... You know the list of people you're allowed to sleep with given the opportunity.  Our rule is that your only allowed to sleep with the person at the top of your list. 
For fun on a rainy weekend a while back, Wayne and I created our top 20 lists…

30 Seconds...

The other day, my husband had an awful experience...
It was a beautiful day so that morning I sent a text to my trainer and asked to take our workout outside.  On really nice days we walk/jog along the harbour and the sea front.  I'm in the process of re-designing his website and since I live on the harbour, I suggested he meet me here so we can go over the latest changes to his site and leave for our walk from here instead of the gym.
Dan parked in the driveway, came in the back door, put his keys on the kitchen table next to my gym bag and after going over his site, we left for our walk... Some time after we left, Wayne came home for some supplies he needed on site.  He came home to find Dan's car parked in his spot, walked in through the back door (which I forgot to lock when I left) and called in to the living room with his usual greeting 'Hi Babe' his call was unanswered and with the door unlocked, seeing my gym bag and Dan's keys on the table - his heart sank. …

Couldn't sleep

I went to bed over an hour ago, but I couldn't sleep so here I am.  It's not really that late, but here in the silent darkness, it feels much later.  I used to have a sleeping disorder.  I didn't sleep for more than a few hours a night for over 10 years and then I met Wayne and he must haven given me the peace I needed because I rarely have problems sleeping any more.
Sitting here with only the glow of the computer screen as light, reminds me of the days I didn't sleep.  Alone with my thoughts in the wee hours of the night, I'd write like this - only then they were letters I'd never send - letters to someone who I felt comfortable telling all my secrets to.  Letters that get written in the middle of the night probably shouldn't get sent.  It's the things that come to you at that hour that are so truthful, they probably should be left until daybreak so you can re-evaluate saying them at all. 
I must confess every once in a while, I'd click send instea…

A revelation...

On my daily walk this morning, I saw a very pregnant woman shopping on the harbor.  It hit me just then, that if all goes according to plan - this time next year, I could be looking very similar to her!  What a revelation!  It's terrifying and exciting all at the same time.  The thing about becoming a parent later in life is is that you have a lot more time to consider things young girls don't like - I wonder how much your body really changes... Is sex as good for him after?... Is sex as good for HER after?? How bad does it really hurt?  Will I love my husband the same way after the baby is born?  I mean, I know I'll love him as much, but I like to dote on him and I worry, he'll get less attention and he won't be as happy.
Then there's the questions I'm sure we all ask like - What kind of mother will I be?  Do I really have the energy?  How do you handle the pressure of knowing if you aren't careful - you can really fuck a kid up for life.  etc. etc....
A…

Still alive...

I haven't written in at least a week (the calender you see isn't visible to me at the moment and I'm too tired to look).  I've been busy with work.  My cosmetics supplier is not playing nice with their advertising guidelines and I've had to re-evaluate how to bring in business without rocking the boat with my advertising methods (I don't like playing by the rules).  I've spent the last week and a half trying to find good ways to advertise on line and I'm coming up short in confidence with any of the options I've found. 
It's a tricky thing this business of mine.  Wayne and I don't need the money and considering I don't like to play by the rules, I always thought it was just a matter of time before they sent me packing.  The thing is that I've grown to depend on it to keep me sane and busy - not to mention, I bring in pretty good money as well.  Last week when I got the warning letter from my supplier, it hit me quite hard.  I knew it…