Basking in the silence

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Ethan started nursery/playschool recently. To be honest, if we had a life that surrounded us with friends, family and lots of other kids for him to play with, I never would have started him so early (he'll be 2 at the end of May), but that is NOT our life.  We don't even have a babysitter. Ethan hasn't been without either me or his dad more then a couple of times in his life.  It's just not a normal life for any of us.  So, I have to do what's best for him and being exposed to adults besides his parents and other children to play with is right for him.

It's 3 hours a day twice a week.  He LOVES it.  I was so stressed out before he started going because he was going through a bout of separation anxiety.  I couldn't leave the room without him crying and Wayne couldn't take him out without him crying and calling Mommy the whole time.  He said he was starting to worry that people would think that he abducted Ethan!

We took Ethan for a couple of taster sessions first (which we were there for).  The night before his first day on his own, I cried several times worrying about the panic he's go through the first time he looked for me and I wouldn't be there.  It killed me, but his first day went without a hitch.  The 2nd day, I fully expected tears because this time he'd know I was going to leave him, but he ran right in without looking back.

Today is his 3rd day.  What a joy it to leave him in a safe place where I know he will have fun and get a couple of hours to do what ever I want.  I have to walk over to pick him up in  an hour, but for the moment, I am basking in the silence.  I'm just sitting here with no TV and no toddler madness.  I am sitting here by myself and relishing in the 'Me time' I almost never get to experience.

I can't wait for the life back home where we will have family he can visit with and his time away from us will be with people who love him.  And babysitters! Wayne and I can actually have time alone!  We can go out to dinner (or stay in) and not have to worry about our parental duties for a night or two.  And play dates with close friends or family - what a lovely thought.  A normal life would be just wonderful.  For now, I will sit here with my Latte and bask in the silence for a little while.



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