Skip to main content

You have to be in it to win it

As I posted a few months back, my husband got very ill with complications of a bust appendix back in November.  He was home recovering and unable to work  for two months.  During that time, (needless to say) I was very distracted and didn't really stay on top of much else than my husband and son. In January, when the smoke cleared, I was sorting through my neglected email inbox and came across my lottery reminder. I followed the link to replay my numbers (the same numbers I played for the last two years until Wayne got sick). I clicked 'play numbers again' and bought my euro-millions ticket for the following 4 weeks. On the UK National Lottery website, you can't renew your Euro-Millions ticket automatically like you can with the UK Lottery. You have to go to the site and renew your tickets manually. While I was there, I thought, I haven't played my numbers in a couple of months - let me just check them and see if they came up...
This happened on January 3rd -  on January 1st, my numbers came up. The jackpot was £25 Million (with no other winners). The same numbers I played for 2 years came up 2 days before. I missed 25 million pounds (tax free in the UK) by 2 days!! I couldn't believe my eyes. It took a minute to register what I was looking at and when I finally realized it, I had enough time to blurt it out to my husband before I broke down sobbing. Now when I say sobbing, I mean SOBBING as if someone had died. On the screen in front of me, I saw all my dreams disappear. I mean we all say, if I ever win the lottery... or if my numbers ever came up... well, my numbers did come up and I missed them by 2 lousy days. The chances of ever winning the lottery are very slim, but the chances of winning the lottery twice - I'd say are slim to none.
I cried for days after that. Not continuously, but randomly when it hit me again and again. My husband wasn't even back to work yet when this happened and we were quickly running through our savings. All the money we had saved to move back to the US, was gone and we were back to square one (Well, square zero since some of our bills were also falling behind).  All I thought was that all of our troubles could have been over. A house in each country and everyone is happy. £25 million pounds happy. I still feel deflated as I write this. I can't tell you what a blow it was for me.
A few weeks later, another UK couple won. They were all over the news. Every time I saw them, I felt sick all over again. Wayne put their interview on when it was on TV and as I listened to them tell their story, I left the room in tears again.
It's been nearly 5 months now and although I've come to terms with it, I still can't get over it. Do I still play the lottery? Yes, but I've changed my numbers. Hey, ya never know...

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Fight Club for Five Year Olds - Part 2

The other mother and I went into the school to meet with the teacher and the assistant head.  We both let them know how upset we were that we were not informed that our children were sent to the office and how much we were against the children being allowed to play fighting games on the playground.  I told them I wouldn't allow it at home and I'm really unhappy that it's being allowed at school.  They admitted it was a problem and explained that they are planning to introduce a a scheme to teach the children to play in a safe way.  They will be calling it 'Super Hero Training'.  They plan to give out capes & masks out to children who behave well as rewards at playtime.  They will have assemblies where they will teach the children to play fighting games without making contact.  I find this to be absurd.  The problem has gone on to long and I doubt they will be able to teach little children to change their games when they have sixty other children to look after o…

Feeling the rain

After I worked out today, I went into the kitchen for a bottle of water and saw the pouring rain out my patio door.  There are few times I can think of wanting to feel the rain more. Without a thought, I went out and stood in the rain.  English rain is cold, but today it felt incredible.  I live in a very public place, but in that kind of weather there was wasn't a soul in sight.  I thought about twirling, but the grown up in me squashed the notion. What I did do though was close my eyes and raise my chin toward the sky to let the rain fall on my face.  In my mind I slowed it all down and took it in.  I swear in those few moments I felt every drop. I've always loved the rain.  I  love the sound of it and like to open the windows and listen to it while drifting off to sleep on stormy nights.  Even as a child I would love to go out and play in. When I got older, I found it sensual and and dreamed of romantic moments that would play out under dark clouds, surrounded by grey tone…

Scary stuff

A few weeks ago, I found a lump in my breast.  I was in the shower.  I thought I felt something, but my first reaction was to not let my mind go there so I quickly moved on.  A few minutes later, I checked again and confirmed it was indeed a lump.  I finished my shower (and my day) trying not to think too much about it.  That night I asked my husband to see what he thought.  We went to the doctor the very next morning.
In short, the doctor referred me to a specialist and told me I'd get an appointment in the mail.  About a week later, I saw the specialist who referred me for more tests.  I had a mammogram on Monday and today I have an ultrasound.  Scary stuff right?
Because we never know when the appointments are going to be, my husband can't plan for it and arrange to be with me.  I've had to see the specialist and have the tests on my own.  This is one of the worst things about living in a foreign country - when my husband can't be there, I am left with no-one else …