It's 4:30 in the morning. I slept from 12 - 3AM just fine, but woke up wide awake. I'm sitting here thinking of a topic to write about. The internet is a beautiful thing - there isn't much that's not right at your fingertips. So, I googled 'Blogging Ideas' and came up with this: What's different about you?
My first thought was - that's a loaded question! and then I really thought about it. What's different about me more than most other people I know? One answer - when it comes to people - I try to look at the whole picture rather than just make a quick judgement about them and their actions (unless my feelings are hurt and then I'm a bit of a nightmare). Anyway, I digress...
Case in point - I've had a bit more of a social life lately. A part of that is groups of moms being together. When alone with most of them, they usually have something negative to say about the other moms. Like - she's a bit quick tempered with her child isn't she? My thought process here is - well, maybe there's a reason for that. Maybe she's got a lot on here plate with 3 kids to deal with and a husband that doesn't help. Maybe she's just tired and when you're tired and fed up, it's hard to be a patient mom. It may not be MY parenting style, but who am I to judges her and her life? When I presented this to the woman who was judging so harshly, she got quiet and had nothing more to say.
Another point - I once worked with a man who was a terrible grouch. He'd complain and for the most part, was always in an awful mood. The people I worked with were always talking about him and hated the guy. Me, well I got to know him and as it turned out, he was grumpy for a reason. His wife was very sick and he spent most of his time outside the office taking care of her. He was pissed off at the world and he was ornery, but who could blame him? Ever since then, when I meet someone who's miserable and moody, I think to myself - maybe there's a good reason for it. There usually is. It's rare to find a person who's just unhappy for no good reason. No-one wants to be that way. No-one plans to end up that way (they couldn't possibly) but it happens and I think most of the time we should probably feel sorry for them instead of being nasty right back.
Life is hard. Marriage is hard. Parenting is hard. Being alone is hard. I could go on and on. In my opinion, we shouldn't judge people. We should try to understand them.
My first thought was - that's a loaded question! and then I really thought about it. What's different about me more than most other people I know? One answer - when it comes to people - I try to look at the whole picture rather than just make a quick judgement about them and their actions (unless my feelings are hurt and then I'm a bit of a nightmare). Anyway, I digress...
Case in point - I've had a bit more of a social life lately. A part of that is groups of moms being together. When alone with most of them, they usually have something negative to say about the other moms. Like - she's a bit quick tempered with her child isn't she? My thought process here is - well, maybe there's a reason for that. Maybe she's got a lot on here plate with 3 kids to deal with and a husband that doesn't help. Maybe she's just tired and when you're tired and fed up, it's hard to be a patient mom. It may not be MY parenting style, but who am I to judges her and her life? When I presented this to the woman who was judging so harshly, she got quiet and had nothing more to say.
Another point - I once worked with a man who was a terrible grouch. He'd complain and for the most part, was always in an awful mood. The people I worked with were always talking about him and hated the guy. Me, well I got to know him and as it turned out, he was grumpy for a reason. His wife was very sick and he spent most of his time outside the office taking care of her. He was pissed off at the world and he was ornery, but who could blame him? Ever since then, when I meet someone who's miserable and moody, I think to myself - maybe there's a good reason for it. There usually is. It's rare to find a person who's just unhappy for no good reason. No-one wants to be that way. No-one plans to end up that way (they couldn't possibly) but it happens and I think most of the time we should probably feel sorry for them instead of being nasty right back.
Life is hard. Marriage is hard. Parenting is hard. Being alone is hard. I could go on and on. In my opinion, we shouldn't judge people. We should try to understand them.
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