The very last time

Sunday, June 12, 2011
Last night I dreamed about someone I haven't laid eyes on in what must be 20 years now. Despite that fact - in my dream, he was aged as if we see each other all the time. He was different yet exactly the same. It's not that I haven't seen pictures of him in recent years. I know what he looks like, but you'd think in my dream, he would have been just as I remember him the last time we were together.
I remember the last time I saw him. I know exactly where we were. I remember his face - his narrowed lips and sad eyes that said I'm sorry and please change your mind both at the same time - just as he was about to walk away from me for the very last time.
Don't you wish you knew when it was going to be the very last time you'd be with someone - so you could memorize it and make it as momentous as it should be? I wish I could go back to my young self (not to change the outcome because that might mean I wouldn't have my family now) and say at that very moment - this person in front of you - he is significant; he has shaped you and changed you, he is more  influential than most people you will ever come across again and this is the last time he will ever stand in front of you. Make it count. Make it beautiful. Tell him you love him (although I may have) and for God's sake, take off your work uniform so his last vision of you is not wearing a white lab coat!

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