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Off my meds

I've been off my meds over a week now. It's a real shock to the system. I've been on this medication (an anti-inflammatory) for a couple of years now and although I knew it helped, I wasn't aware of just how much.
For the most part, I do okay during the day, but mornings and evening are difficult. My husband keeps asking me why I'm so quiet. Last night, I had to ask him to stop asking. I think he was afraid I was upset with him for something. I get quiet when I'm in pain. I don't like to complain and I'm also quietly trying to figure out how long I'll be able to do this for. I'm hoping I'll get used to it and cope better after a little time.
Today, I tripped over one of my son's toys and made things worse for myself. I jolt like that really makes inflammation worse and I'm really feeling it. When it first happened, it hurt so bad I thought I'd be sick. My three year old son kept saying to me: 'Breathe out' while patting me on the back and then said, 'don't you remember what Daddy said to me the other day? You have to watch where you're walking!' If not for him being so adorable, I'm not sure I would have pulled myself together so quickly. That and knowing he was truly concerned. I didn't want him to worry so I sucked it up and put on a brave face. Now, I'm just wishing there was something I could do to help calm things down.
Last night I cursed my doctor while trying to sleep. I may have called him a sadist. I'm sure there is a very good reason I needed to stop taking my meds before even trying to conceive, but it felt better to curse someone.

Comments

Stan said…
Hang in there Buddy. It's for a good cause!

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