A Plastic Plant

Monday, January 6, 2014
I was talking to a close friend the other day about this blog.  I told her if this blog was a plant that needed my time and attention, it would have shriveled up and died a long time ago.  I told her that maybe it's time I shut it down and say good-bye to Pond Hopper.  She said, 'So it's a plastic plant. It doesn't need your time or attention.  All it needs to do is sit there until you need it.  Your blog has helped other people in the same situation feel less alone.  Your blog has helped you through the rough times.  It's your connection to the rest of the world when you feel you don't have one.  It's given you your voice'
She is a good friend.  Everything she said was true, but here is my real problem I've had in recent years with this blog - Too many people know about it.  I know, that's what most people want out of a blog right?  That was never my intention though.  I know it may not seem it because I don't have tons of comments on my posts, but I get a lot of emails from not only readers, but requests to review products or to back the latest travel or expat website, service or even the occasional TV show.  I never wanted to make money from this blog.  It was exactly what my friend said it was - my connection to the rest of the world when I didn't feel I had one.  It's not the strangers I mind seeing it though.  The people I know that are the real problem.  When I started out, nobody knew about this site.  I didn't tell my family about it (and still haven't) and told only my closest friends.  I did that because I wanted to tell the truth without worrying about what anyone else thought about it, but through the years people have stumbled across it (some welcome and some not so welcome).  It has come up in conversation with people I've known here in the UK.  "Passerbyers" is how I refer to most people I've known here.  People who stay around for a little while and in time, pass me by (Sometimes quietly and seamlessly and sometimes not).  No one stays for very long and when they move on knowing about this blog, I wish I never let them know about it.  People I don't care to share my life with can just pop on here and catch up or have an insight I wouldn't give them other wise.  There are others that know about this blog that haven't passed by as of yet, but will in time.  They would find offense in my saying certain things because in some strange way, they believe they aren't like the rest and that I should see them in a different light, so I can't tell the truth and in turn, I say nothing.
Case in point: I recently vented on Facebook about something that happened at my son's school that upset me (without mentioning the school's name or anyone in particular). A few days later, I was confronted by the assistant head for having a 'rant' on Facebook because one of the Moms I'm Facebook friends with, went to the school and told them about.  Now don't get me wrong, 99% of the people I'm FB friends with don't know about this blog, but it just goes to show that people can't be trusted with even the smallest of things.  They will spread it like wildfire and before you know it, you are fighting a battle, you don't need and never asked for.
Does what I am saying make any sense?  If we've never met and you follow this blog, don't get me wrong - the posts are more for you than anyone (with the exception of a select few important people I've shared this blog with that know me personally).  It's the passerbyers from my real life that I wish I could stop from seeing it so I can go back to speaking my mind and telling the truth.
So what do I do?  Do I close down my beloved Pond Hopper and start fresh on a new unknown site? Do I add a user name and password function to view this site?  Do I leave it up for prosperity and start keeping a personal journal instead?  I don't know, but please feel free to give your opinion because now is the time.


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3 comments:

  1. andrea said...:

    First I think it is completely odd that someone you are friends with would go and tell the school what you said. I would unfriend her, personally. I have thought about this too but then I figured in the scheme of things it doesn't matter if people read this that I have known at some point, as long as they don't do anything hurtful with what I post.

  1. Erren said...:

    Hi Andrea,
    I don't know why, but for some reason I don't get comment notifications anymore. I promise I wasn't being rude or ignoring you (I hate that sort of thing) and I apologize for not responding sooner.
    Believe me, if I knew who it was, I'd unfriend her, but I have no idea who did it so I'm just more careful these days on who sees what.
    Since writing that post, the popular response has been similar to your's so I'm pretty sure Pond Hopper will remain (if I get any time to post). Thanks so much for your support.

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