I'm supposed to be at the gym right now. I think the heat has me feeling sluggish. I keep telling myself to just get up and go, but I really don't feel like it. The dialog in my head has been - 'I guess I don't have to do weights today. Maybe I'll just do cardio' and 'Maybe I can go later' followed by 'God it's hot today - why doesnt his damned country believe in air conditioning??' As I type, I'm still debating in my head on weather or not to just go before I don't go at all.
My weekend pretty much sucked. The only friend I thought I had - I lost over the weekend. Our doom has been impending for a while now. I won't go into details, but he told me he wasn't me friend after a drawn out discussion. I've been told that my standards are too high and I expect too much out of people. Maybe it's true. Maybe I do judge too harshly. I just expect that if I'm going to be friends with someone, we have to at least have the same values and morals. I can't respect someone that lies, cheats or has no integrity. I can't be friends with someone I don't respect. So yeah, maybe my standards are too high, but maybe it's something I don't really need to change. I don't know. Maybe I should just go to the gym...
It's been a while since I blogged regularly. I guess I've been going by the rule - if you don't have anything nice to say - don't say anything at all. I hate 'woe is me' type entries and for the last month or so, I've been really down and haven't had anything good to say. I think it started with the news that Aniela (my fellow expat girlfriend) was moving back to the US and was exacerbated by the incident with Wayne's cousin and the flare up of my condition (along with a general feeling of homesickness & loneliness). I was really depressed for quite a few weeks there and haven't been doing much more than going to the gym and other random things to keep me busy during the day. I haven't even worked on my web classes (in any serious way) in weeks (probably because I can't concentrate when I'm in pain - never mind get very motivated). I'm not so down anymore. Maybe it's the sunshine. Maybe it's the fact that I'...
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