Yesterday, after writing about a friend that died many years ago, I had a comment by a reader that told me I must live in the present. Yesterday was not a good day to say this to me. It bothered me - as if I was being told I don't live in the present or worse it suggested I should forget my friend. This is a public blog that has visitors from all over the world most of whom I don't know. Comments are bound to be made - some I'll agree with and others I won't. It's a part of the experience and I welcome any feedback that my readers want to give. But I have to say that this comment just didn't sit well with me and I'm going to attempt to explain why.
I don't like being told to forget my past. It's insulting to be told to forget what's made me the person I am. I think people spend too much damn time trying to forget their pasts. Believe me, there are a lot of things I would like to forget. My life has not always been easy. I had a childhood that I'm still trying to recover from and I've had things happen since that I'd also like to forget. Unfortunately, try as we may - we can't forget the past. All we can do is try to not let it effect the present.
The women in my family are notorious for being bitter people. They had bad things happen to them and they let it get the best of them. They dwelled on the bad so much that they became people that most wouldn't like or want to be around. I do not want this to be my legacy. I don't want to turn into that sort of person. One of the ways I keep from doing so is to let the bad things go and hold on to the good. I may have had a lot to overcome, but I also have been blessed to have had people in my life that gave me wonderful things to hold on to. I have been loved by some pretty great people and that's what I choose to hold onto so that I don't let the bad stuff turn me into someone I don't ever want to be.
As a friend recently said, I live very much in the present. That being said, my present isn't always something worth writing about. How many posts can I have about how in love I am with my husband before people start getting sick to their stomachs? And as for the rest of my day to day life - During the week, I spend 80% of my time alone. I work from this computer and I don't have any friends in this country. There's no social life to share. I can't say this happened to me today or that happened yesterday because most of the time - nothing has happened. I'm not going to write about the what I watched on TV, what I made for dinner or about the illness I have that keeps me in almost contestant pain. I want to write about my life and if there's nothing from today to share - I always have yesterday. This blog is my chronicle of my today, my yesterdays and with some luck - all of my tomorrows. The past cannot be forgotten - this is a fact. I choose to cherish yesterday, live for today and hope for tomorrow. It's the best I can do.
My in-laws just left after a five day visit. I don't mind it being a five day visit, but then again, five days of your house not being your own is always a bit unsettling and although I don't look forward to their departure when they are here, I can't say I'm sad to have things go back to normal. As a treat for my son's birthday, we took him to the Museum of Natural History in London on Thursday. He chose to go because we took him last year (he's been crazy about dinosaurs since he was three years old). They give out adventure packs at the museum which consist of a back pack, safari hat, and binoculars with an adventure to follow during their visit. The back pack has clues in it to solve a mystery. Last year it had a dinosaur claw, a tooth and a sample of dinosaur skin he had to match up to one on display. He had a great time solving the mystery and even remembered which dinosaur it ended up being. Last year's trip was wonderful. We walked right in,
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